“A princess, a priestess, a bodyguard, a prisoner, a con artist, a goofball, and me, self-appointed asshole in charge of them all.”
The sun is dying…and it’s happening way too damn fast.
With the clock ticking, the Nine Planets’ only hope of survival rests on a fancy space station and the alien artifact it’s carrying. Which is why it really sucks when some jackass doesn’t want the universe saved and blows that station up— while you’re still on it.
So if your only choices are flaming death or stealing a flying hunk of space junk— you pick that busted-ass spaceship. Even if it leaves seven strangers with deadly secrets trapped together: a princess, a prisoner, a con artist, a warrior, a priestess, a mercenary, and an asshole in charge of us all.
Now every faction in the galaxy is hunting this ship— from the Sisterhood to the Corporation, and the rebellion’s joining in on the fun, too. We just need to stop drinking, fighting, and screwing long enough to evade them all and save the freaking universe…somehow.
Because apparently the only thing standing between a dying sun and ultimate salvation is seven unlikely misfits…ahem, heroes.
This book was so bad it brought me out of book blog retirement.
Look, did I expect Star Bringer to be a literary masterpiece? Of course not. I picked it up looking for some turn-your-brain-off fun. Unfortunately, my brain turned on and I wasn’t having fun. So I decided to try another fun reading experience: being a hater. On that front, I had a marvelous time.
At first, I was happy to ignore the cornball humor and the holes in the world-building. But once I got about 25% in, I couldn’t do it anymore. My suspension of disbelief was broken and spilling out all over the damn place.
First of all, the world-building is shallow at best. Why does only one planet have its own language? What exactly is the Corporation and what are its ties to the Empire? Why are they seemingly on the same side? How long has the Empire been in power? What are the goals of the Rebellion? How long have they been fighting? What do they even do? And what about these “Ancients” we keep hearing about? Why do we learn nothing about them over the course of the novel? None of these questions are answered at any point.
In fact, instead of having these characters adventure and discover clues and answers, 80% of the book is spent with them fucking around on their ship and dealing with interpersonal drama. But that doesn’t mean the character and relationship development is good. On the contrary, we get to hear in passing about how two characters bonded over a conversation or taught each other something. We don’t actually see these scenes. I know “show, don’t tell” is cliched writing advice, but damn if it isn’t true. This book is 600 pages of nothing, all the action scenes a speedrun and important character interaction mentioned as an afterthought.
But maybe that’s a blessing in disguise because these characters are some of the most unbearable characters I’ve ever read. Kali has the same conflict over and over, Beckett’s arc is just Kali’s but even less developed, and we hardly know anything about Merrick, Max, and Gage (the only three characters to not get a POV). Rain is the most tolerable, being sunshine incarnate, but even she gets boring after a while. And that just leaves the worst character in this book: Ian.
I hate Ian so much, it’s unreal. He’s supposed to be a bad boy type, but he’s just an inconsistent jerk. Moreover, he’s a misogynist. Here’s a really for real thing he says in his inner monologue: “The really sad thing is, I like her. Besides Milla— and that’s very different— I’ve never actually liked a woman before. Maybe because I’ve never allowed myself to know them well enough to get to that stage, or maybe because none of them were as fascinating as Kali.” My mouth was agape when I read that. This is our romantic lead?!
Later, when Kali is nearly dying while the two of them are being attacked, he decides to die protecting her. They get rescued in the nick of time, and he says: “I can’t believe how close we both just came to dying. And just how much I didn’t want her to die, just how much I hated that I couldn’t save her. Now that the threat is over, none of those feelings make sense. That’s not who I am. And it’s sure as shit not who I want to be.” He’s the worst and I want him dead. (By the way, we’ll come back to this scene later.)
Now let’s talk about the romances: Kali/Ian and Rain/Beckett. Neither of these couples has any chemistry. Both of them, but especially the sapphic couple, are pretty instalove. And the sex scenes are so unsexy (but naturally, Kali and Ian’s big sex scene goes on for several pages, while Rain and Beckett’s only goes on for about two). It’s unfortunate because Rain and Beckett have a really cute scene in a lake near the beginning of the novel, but it quickly falls apart after that.
If you’ve heard of Cinema Sins, I know the phrase “deus ex machina” throws up some red flags. But this book uses some of the truest deus ex machina since the Ancient Greek plays the term originated from. A fleet of enemy ships is attacking the crew? Don’t worry, their sentient alien ship will simply take over with the most incredible invasive maneuvers and solar blasts ever seen! None of the characters have to do anything! The Starlight will take care of it for them.
This happens on a smaller scale as well. The characters will have a problem that will be easily solved within a chapter or so. Sometimes it’s solved in a few pages! There are no stakes to anything, so it’s hard to care about anything. In fact, even the most climactic scenes leave our “heroes” relatively unscathed and are over before you can blink. After all, we have to get back to the ship to do nothing!
Remember how I said we get no answers to anything? Well, that’s not entirely true. It’s just that the answers we do get come in the last 25% of the book. Instead of weaving backstories throughout the narrative, Wolff and Croft wait to drop it all toward the end. I want to talk about the two biggest things, so if you want to avoid spoilers don’t read the next section.
SPOILERS AHEAD
Okay, so the big twist: it turns out Kali is the high priestess, not Rain. You’d have to have never read a book before to not pick up on that. Kali is the one with the connection to the alien ship. Plus, Beckett notes that Rain’s high priestess birthmark looks like a tattoo. Later, we find out Kali has a mysterious scar in the same place on her body. Yes, her mother did remove the high priestess birthmark and Rain’s was fake. However did you guess?
Here’s the other big reveal: Ian, Max, and Milla (who they spend the book planning to rescue) are not siblings, but one person (Ian) who somehow splits into three when he was twelve. How did this happen? Ian literally doesn’t tell us. He just says he walked through some dunes, went through “something painful,” and then suddenly was three people with a hive mind. It may have something to do with contact with alien DNA, but it’s unclear how. This is just something else in this world that simply is.
And remember that scene I said we’d come back to? So, it turns out if Ian, Max, or Milla dies, they all die. So when Ian decided to die defending Kali, he also sentenced Max and Milla to death. Even though they are Ian, they’re also their own people. People with agency. Agency that Ian took away from them. Did I mention that I hate Ian?
SPOILERS OVER
Lastly, there are things in this book that just don’t make sense. As I mentioned in the spoiler section, Ian, Max, and Milla have a hive mind and can talk to each other telepathically. The twist explains this. What it doesn’t explain is how no one notices when Ian will stop mid-conversation to have a mental conversation with Max. Is he just… standing there staring into space? Why do the other characters act like no time has passed? Apparently to them, everything is normal.
Max and Ian are also always aware of what is happening with the other one. Well, that’s not true. Max knows exactly what’s happening with Ian (including when he has sex), but the reverse doesn’t seem to be true. Why? It just doesn’t make sense!!!!!
On page 271, Ian calls Gage a “tosser.” This is British slang, which makes sense because Nina Croft is British. Except that’s the only time in the whole 600-page novel British slang is used. The entire rest of the time, American slang is used. I guess Croft wrote that chapter?
Another small thing is, in the first 40% or so, Max and Gage seem to be having a behind-the-scenes romance. The most explicit evidence is when Gage kisses Max on the cheek. But then this just gets dropped and never mentioned again.
On page 377, I found this obvious error: “… until Kali, Gage, and I are the last two conscious people on board.” That’s three people, Ian (and Wolff, Croft, and editing team).
Also, here’s this terrible, nonsensical metaphor: “It all slammed into me like the frequent meteor showers on Serati.” You can’t use a simile for throwaway world-building!
If you go on Storygraph, most of the reviews for this book are between four and five stars. I am baffled, befuddled, bemused. How? This book is garbage! And like, I know that’s a subjective opinion. But why aren’t there more people who share it with me? Did they have a different copy of the book? At the time of writing this, my review is the lowest rating for this book on Storygraph.
I didn’t initially think I’ve be giving this book below maybe 2.75 stars. But it just felt like it would never end and every page I read, I got sicker and sicker of it. And so now it’s my lowest rated book of the year. No, when it comes to this waste of time and paper, I’m not bringing the stars.
Two sapphic main characters & chronic pain
Semi-graphic violence, shootouts, gunshot wounds, suicide (on page, minor character), human experiments (discussed in vague terms, not on page), human trafficking, alcohol use, & death
Have you read Star Bringer by Tracy Wolff & Nina Croft? What are your thoughts? Let’s discuss in the comments!
Strange Storyteller 
Thank you for writing this review and confirming that I’m not crazy. This book almost reads like an AI wrote it, it’s so artlessly thrown together. I kept waiting for the good part to happen, the part that got everybody excited about it, and then the book ended without that part ever arriving. Literature doesn’t have to be complicated to be good, but there’s a level of simplicity that’s just insulting to your audience, and this is that.
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